A Little Bit Of Humour # 166

WHY DID THE BIGAMIST CROSS THE ROAD?

Why did the bigamist cross the road?
Well not just to get to the other side
The reason he wanted to cross over
Was so he could get to the other bride

TO A GARDENER

To a gardener,
A grassed over area
Is just a flowerbed
That has yet to appear

ARE YOU WEARING ODD SOCKS? # 2

Are you wearing odd socks?
I suppose the look is a bit hipster
But honestly at your age, you are
Meat and drink for a quipster

THE PLURAL OF TOOTH

So if it is correct that
The plural of tooth is teeth
Then why isn’t the plural
Of booth, beeth

IT IS A SAD FACT OF LIFE THAT IF # 1

It is a sad fact of life that if
Several things can go to ****,
The one to be befall you
Will cause the most shock

IF CLERGYMEN CAN BE DEFROCKED # 1

If clergymen can be defrocked
And lawyers be disbarred
Then that must mean that
Tree surgeons can be debarked

THE GUINNESS BOOK OF RECORDS

The Guinness book of records
Have published an update
The world’s untidiest man has died
And his body is lying in a state

A CHICKEN AT THE MOVIES

A chicken at the movies
Made the whole theatre look
So the manager asked
“Why are you here chook?”
The chicken replied,
“Well, because I liked the book”

I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO EXERCISE

I have been told to exercise
But I am deliberately refraining
As refusing to go to the gym
Counts as resistance training

HOSPITALITY IS AN ART FORM

Hospitality is an art form
Making your guests feel
Like they're actually at home,
While wishing they were for real

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A Little Bit Of Humour # 166